Whole Humans

What’s the thing you’re most scared to do? What would it take to get you to do it?

While it is the most natural and should be the easiest thing to do. But it is not.

Singing the song of my heart will hurt the sentiments of people close to me. Singing this song will offend people in power who can wreak havoc in my life. And I don’t want that. I would rather write about cat fights and live a peaceful life.

I tell myself to be brave and take opposition. Existence will support me when the going will get tough. But no, my heart won’t budge.

Thomas Paine had said:

He who dares not offend can not be honest.

Thomas Paine

I wonder why am I this way?

Am I twisted by design or by conditioning?

I think latter is the case.

Because our parents raised me to be so afraid of future, of uncertainties, of living life to the fullest.

My parents must have inculcated this fear of being mindful of my words lest people get angry.

But why do parents raise us to be so fearful? Why do they teach us to suppress our true selves?

Because they were taught this way. Because they saw everyone around them doing the same. So they thought this is the right way.

We never question.

We never dare change the status-quo.

To follow in line is peaceful and comforting.

But I think when you do that you are hurting yourself emotionally. When you suppress your urge to express yourself openly without any fear you are harming your core. You are disrespecting existence itself if you don’t express your innermost thoughts.

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What will it take then?

I need to be less afraid of the consequences. I need to be more willing to embrace the discomfort and unease that accompanies honesty.

I need to ask myself ‘What is the worst that could happen to me?’

Once I am okay and accept the worst as a part and parcel of life I will transform.